And, this is in essence what's wrong with the world and society today. There is no respect and there is a lot of separation. All this us verses them shit, and different sets of rules and privileges depending on what you look like and what what you were born with. And, it's bullshit.
Tuesday, July 12, 2016
This is how I was raised by my grandparents (sorta), you didn't pass the potatoes at the table, the only thing that got passed was the salt and pepper (together mind you because they're a pair). Momma fixed the plates while pops and kids were getting situated at the table and pops plate was always brought out first and then the kids with momma bringing hers out when she came to sit. Then, if you were religious you prayed then you began to eat. Yes, everybody had their plates and were sitting at the table and you ate as a family. But, the main message of this is for people to fucking quit putting their kids before their husbands or wives. By doing that, you show that the husband or wife has no say in what happens and doesn't deserve respect. And, I wholly agree with that sentiment. My last two divorces were over her kids having more authority than I and for her arguing with me, (in front of the kids, mind you) when I'd try to correct her kids in some way. And, I don't care who it is, I'll tell them straight up, if you're going to put your kids before me. Then that's all you have as far as I'm concerned. Especially since if I want a relationship with someone, they will be put before my kids. Now, before anybody goes off half cocked. I'm not saying your kids should be put to the side for your man or woman, you're supposed to be a goddamn FAMILY. And, if either side is being neglected or it's otherwise detrimental to any of the children. Then, that relationship shouldn't exist. I'm not sure what my relationship beliefs would be called. Because what we consider tradition now, was new age for my grandparents. E. g. in my grandmas home, growing up and in her adult years, dinner was served to the men first and when they had their fill, then elder (8ish +) children, then the women and younger children got what was left. I don't see that going over today, even in a "traditional" household, nor do I believe it should. I do believe it's the mans job to provide for his family, and take of the homestead, and the woman should be able to stay home and raise their children properly. Also, in my grandparents day, every able body had a job and chores, you're old enough to walk, you were old enough to work. Now, I'm not talking about having them milk cows and mow the yard, but there was something they could do, help feed chickens, help string beans, sort beans, or more modernly, sort clothes, clean, vacuum, pick up toys and trash. But, I don't have a problem with a man staying home while his wife works. It's just whatever works for each family, in my opinion. But, what's missing now a days is the respect part. And, it's because people "put their kids first". And that's bullshit. Personally, I will not have my woman "correct" me or get onto me because I corrected their kid or told them not to do something or to not do something, there will be no argument about it. No, this isn't any of that my way or the highway shit, but if you have a problem with what I say or do, it can be discussed later in private, and then we can work it out or decide to go our separate ways. But, it will be guaranteed that if you get onto me or argue with me about something I said to your kid, different ways will be gone. And, I also guarantee that I won't correct you in front of mine or yours. That's just giving the kids the impression that there are two sets of rules and two septet families that just happen to hang out a lot or live together.